7 steps to let go and go with the flow
A powerful way of going with the flow and practice allowing is practicing it in situations that you are dreading, or tend to react to, or are difficult for you in general. For example, going to a meeting or get together that you really don’t want to go to, going over school work with your child, going to the dentist, a phone call you have to make, knowing that you are going into a situation that you usually get triggered, etc. When we are triggered, we go to automatic thoughts and feelings. Tuning in to our triggers and going with the flow is a pathway to observe and catch these automatic responses and steer our reactions to actions that put us in a better feeling and positive place.
When you allow, you are in a great place to open up your perspective and think differently instead of just reacting. So much of changing our mental reactions is to tune into our bodies first. Just saying go with the flow can create a release of tension we hold in our body – thus allowing us to be more aware and retrain how you think in situations that trigger you into old feelings and thoughts. Also, when we relax our bodies, we allow more awareness and clarity.
So how do you retrain your thinking in situations that trigger you into old feelings and thoughts? Practice, practice, practice! These steps can help; you can remind yourself with the acronym I ALLOWW:
- I for INTENTION- Set an intention beforehand of what you want to experience which could involve feeling good, being positive, relaxing and enjoying yourself, finding the best in the people or situation you are in, etc. You can set an intention for what not to do too – to let go of your need to be right, to control, to look or act a certain way. You can set the intention you are going to notice something that you like about this situation rather than just notice the bits that make you feel bad or uncomfortable or that you are not going to react to anything that triggers you, rather you are going to make note of the trigger and write it down for later examination. Setting an intention allows you to observe and guide your thoughts with purpose and the intention of feeling different, feeling better. If you find yourself in an unplanned situation, use your feeling of being uncomfortable to remind you to tune in and start the process of intending a more positive outcome than your natural reaction would be.
- A for AWARENESS - Be aware, check in and watch yourself periodically when you are in the situation and repeat your intention. It’s easy to forget once you and in it and on auto pilot, so find a way to remind yourselt - write a star on your hand, set a timer before you go, or tell someone that you are with to remind you someway when they notice you are going on auto pilot -anything that will remind you to check in with yourself and tune in to going with the flow.
- L for LOWER your armor - When you start feeling the old feelings you want to change, consciously lower your armor and go with the flow. Once you start tuning into the moments that you start to block or react, you’ll find that you can almost sense a wall or shield you pull up that closes you off. When you feel or sense this, consciously lower that energy and sooth yourself with nice throughts like I’m here, I am going to be here for a period of time, why don’t I just see if I can change this situation into something that I feel better about or even (gasp) ENJOY? Or what if I let go of any control and just allow this person to speak or act without trying to change them? You could even set a challenge for yourself -- the worse it is the more I’m going to float through and not let anything get to me because it’s not personal. I will look and find parts that make me feel good in this situation.
- L for LOVE– Tune in to what you love around you - about the people, places or things there that bring you a feeling of joy and love. Is there an animal around? A beautiful plant or tree? A person there that you really like? Be creative, look around and find those things that make you happy and feel love. By tuning in to love, you are tuning into the highest vibration energy of the universe as demonstrated in the book called The Hidden Messages in Water. I LOVE this book – but let’s not get too off topic here!
- O for OPEN- Open up your awareness and relax, feel the weight of yourresistance/worry/tension that you have lift and leave your body. When you do this, feel the tension of those resistant thoughts noticeably release and realize just how good it feels. When we resist, we close ourselves off and block experiences, so let’s do the opposite here and be open.
- W for WHY – Do a quick mental check in and ask yourself what is it that is making you feel uncomfortable or less than happy? Again, make a note of it so you can examine it later. Consider that you have a false belief that you can work on later - intentions are a great way to reprogram some of the negative beliefs we carry with us that simply are not true. Reinforce yourself with positive affirmations. I am enough, I am powerful, I am light, etc. are all good examples of this. Once you figure out what is making you feel negative, decide that you are going to let go of the thoughts that are blocking you from enjoying yourself.
- W for WHAT? - What’s in this situation that I can learn from? What if I just relax and enjoy and not think that I have to do something? What if I just listen, nod and enjoy another perspective on things without having to agree with it, or say what I think? What if I just allow the other person to feel that way. What if I just watch and enjoy? What if I can change this situation from making me feel bad to it making me feel good? What if I consciously change this to a positive and what if I can do this any time I CHOOSE?
By practicing these steps are a great mental tool and allows us to tap into the true power of making conscious choices to change outcomes, to be the change. They allow us to quickly and effectively glide around the triggers that make you react and derail you.
It’s ok if you start and forget, or react or it takes you 10 practices to get through to the last W – the point is to make a habit of being aware and consciously change situations that make you feel bad to a situation that feels good.
Make it your intent to go with the flow today and see what magic happens by being open.
I’d love to hear if you have any thoughts and tips to get you into the flow and practice the art of allowing.